...And Nothing But the Tooth
By Brate
ATF Universe
Chris Larabee helped maneuver his best friend onto the couch. He had brought him back to the ranch, and with very little help from the sharpshooter, into the house. Vin was still feeling some effects from the medication he'd been given to have his tooth pulled. Chris looked down at the sleeping agent. "You're too much damn trouble, Cowboy," he muttered. But worth it, he added internally. He pulled a blanket over Vin, and ambled into his kitchen.
He'd promised the others dinner, and knew better than to renege with his team. Searching the kitchen, he discovered enough hamburger and extras; he figured they could grill out on the barbeque. That way the mess would be kept to a minimum, since the leader was certain he would be cleaning up alone.
The blond had managed to make a couple dozen patties by the time he heard the approaching vehicles. Glancing in on the Texan, he saw the slumbering man turn over and resume his snoring. Chris smiled. There was no way his friends were going to let this opportunity pass; he just wondered what they would come up with. Looking around his home, he hoped it was nothing too destructive. He went to open the door, and warn the team of the sleeping man before the boisterous group burst in.
When he opened the door and saw the first arrivals, he couldn't stop the chuckle that burst forth. On the porch were Buck and JD, only not dressed as they usually were. The ladies' man was wearing an expensive suit, tie, and Italian shoes. "Good evening to you, Mr. Larabee," Buck drawled in a false, albeit good, Southern accent. "And what delightful provisions are available for our consumption?"
Speechless, Chris turned, as he was addressed by the youngest member of his team, now clad in a sport coat and khakis, habitually worn by the medic in the group. "How's Vin? Is he resting? He should be resting after the surgery he went through today; his body needs time to heal."
Retrieving the ability of communication, Chris spoke without inflection, "You guys are nasty."
"I assure you, I have no idea to what you are referring, Mr. Larabee. Mr. Jackson and I have arrived, per your invitation, to dinner. Were we required to bring refreshments?"
JD stood next to his partner in crime, grinning, as another vehicle rolled up the drive.
Ezra exited Nathan's Explorer; followed by the last two team members. Standish was in a flannel shirt and jeans. "Brothers, why are we all standing around out here? Are we enjoying the beauty of nature with which God has blessed us?"
Josiah answered the question, "C'mon guys," he fairly gushed. "Are we gonna eat or what? I'm starving." He looked enormously out of place in jeans, Foo Fighters tee shirt, and a newsboy cap on his head.
Last came Nathan. "I jest want y'all to know I'm giving up a chance at heaven tonight; I had to say no to Becky," he grinned mischievously. The healer was outfitted in a Hawaiian shirt and tight blue jeans. "She done near cried her eyes out."
"He's in on the couch, sleeping," announced Chris after the men finished showing off for themselves. "And you are on your own. I'll be in the back tending the grill."
As Chris took the meat patties out back, the five men trooped into the living room and stared down at their fellow agent. "Mr. Dunne," quietly called out the real Ezra. "Go get us some beers, and one empty beer can."
"Why do you want an empty one?" the youngest questioned.
"Just do it."
Grumbling, JD complied as the others found their seats and Josiah made a move to turn on the TV before Standish stopped him. "Wait just a minute, Mr. Sanchez. I don't want our comrade to wake up quite yet."
The preacher held the remote in his hand, waiting for whatever plan Ezra came up with. When JD returned with the beers, he passed one out to each man, while Ezra took the empty one, wrapping Vin's hand around it. "Now, JD," he said. "Remember what Nathan would think of Vin drinking beer in his condition." JD grinned as Ezra sat down in the chair, nodding to Josiah. The large man turned on the basketball game and the men began cheering loudly, as if they'd been watching for a while.
Vin started awake and looked around, blinking his eyes. Once he focused on the group in the room with him, he noticed something was off. "What're y'all doin' here?" he asked.
"Why, Mr. Tanner," Buck replied, "we were invited to watch the game and eat dinner, don't you recall?"
"Buck?" Vin questioned.
"Yeah," Nathan answered. "What's up, Junior?"
The sharpshooter turned to look at the healer and realized what he was wearing. "Why are ya dressed like that, Nate?"
"Why shouldn't I be wearing this?" JD asked. "It's what I normally wear."
Tanner looked over at the young agent and blinked his eyes again.
"You okay, Vin? Want me to go get Chris?" Josiah eagerly asked. "I can go get him."
"Would you like another beer, Brother?" Ezra inquired, all trace of his accent gone.
Vin shook his head in confusion. He noticed the can in his hand and placed it on the table next to him, before rubbing his hands over his eyes. He looked around the room once more. "How long y'all been here?"
"Not long, 'bout an hour. Are you okay?" asked Nathan.
"It's that beer, isn't it?" JD demanded. "I told you not to drink it while ya still had the dentist's drugs in your system, and ya went ahead anyway. You guys never listen when I give ya good advice."
"My dear Mr. Jackson," Buck drawled, "it's not that we don't listen, it's that you give so much advice that we cannot possibly accept it all."
Josiah asked again, "Should I get Chris?"
"No, I think I jest need some air," Vin responded. "Where is he?"
"Should be cooking the burgers," Nathan told his friend. "Chris is sure to burn 'em. Why don't you check on him?"
Vin nodded and retreated out the rear of the house. Once he left the room, the five men launched into action, racing out front to the Explorer, and changed into their duplicate set of clothes stashed in the back. They had bought two sets of each outfit, in the two sizes to fit each of the men wearing them. Once everyone was back in their proper attire, they hid the other clothes in the rear of the vehicle, and resumed their places in the living room. Just as they sat down, they heard their two friends returning from the grill.
"I'm tellin' ya Chris, I think they're nuts. They'se all wearing weird outfits and talkin' funny."
JD had to smother his laughter as he heard the Texan trying to convince Chris of their insanity. The other men quickly hid their grins as the sharpshooter led his leader into the room.
Stopping short at the entrance, Tanner looked around at the men seated on the furniture. "What the hell's goin' on?
Buck looked up, surprised. "We done told you, Junior. We're watching the game and waiting for Chris to get done killing our burgers."
"But...you was...I mean..." The flabbergasted agent wasn't sure which way to turn.
Chris stood behind him, with a slight smirk on his face. He shook it off and turned his friend around. "Everything looks fine to me, Vin. Why don't you go wash up, maybe splash some water on your face?"
The Texan nodded and left the room. The six men waited a few moments before breaking out in laughter.
"I wish I had a video camera," cackled Nathan with tears streaming down his face.
JD was having a hard time catching his breath. Buck was doubled over on the floor and Josiah sat grinning like the Cheshire Cat.
"Did you see the look on his face?" asked Ezra through the laughing.
Team Seven managed to get themselves under control prior to Vin's reentry, but just barely. The subdued sharpshooter merely asked when the meal would be ready, and reported he was going for a walk.
Josiah looked around at his associates. "So, who gets to explain this to Brother Vin at work tomorrow?"
All eyes turned toward Chris. The leader raised his hands up in surrender. "No way! This was all your idea."
"Maybe we should we draw straws?" the youngest asked.
